“It is important that your actions are appreciated.”

Motherhood is portrayed in society like the perfect Instagram feed

Behind the curtains hides the reality, a mother with real feelings and thoughts – mostly tired of running around, sometimes sad, sometimes distressed, a mother who needs to be seen, appreciated and supported. Not only from the partner, but also from society.

Women, especially mothers, understand this around, but society in general still does not see the many roles that mothers carry on a daily basis and what this entails. It is not talked about as it is still taboo.

We, mothers, are like sponges that soak up all the day’s stress, chores and children’s bad moods, but at the same time we still have to put on a good face and cope with everything. This project isn’t because we moms want to whine or that we don’t like being moms.

We LOVE being moms, we wouldn’t change a thing! We just want to change the status so that it is not taboo. We want society to see the value of mothers, appreciate us and protect us in all possible ways, including laws. And this applies to all mothers – whether they are working or stay at home mothers – we all have many more jobs throughout the day than others, and in addition – we have 24/7 on our minds, whether at work or at home, all these different roles that come with motherhood, not to mention worry for the well-being and health of the child.

“We just want to change its status so it’s not taboo.”

Adele – Founder of the project

I am Adele Rüütel, a 35-year-old mother of four children, and I have dedicated 110% to my children for the last 13 years, because we mothers dedicate all our time, feelings, thoughts and dreams to our children. During that time I never realized how much of myself I was giving away  because I had not received the real support and appreciation from the outside, which I know now is absolutely necessary.

On top of that, unfortunately, one day my body just gave up, finally saying NO. I was very confused as to why this happened, as my way of thinking has never led me to realize HOW MUCH I was actually giving up all the time and how much I really should have taken care of myself too – not just my family.

My greatest desire is to bring this attention, this knowledge, this thinking to other women like me, as well as to all others who have not understood it in this way. To help society realize that in fact, every mother also needs her own time, to deal with herself, in order to achieve everything and to be able to handle it all.

Motherhood is not easy, even though they say so. I love being a mom! But I understand only now, after my body showed me, that it is actually incredibly exhausting. It’s basically proportional to performing 30 different roles each day, roles that not everyone could handle alone. And if you also take into account, for example, 4 children… you can multiply the number of roles even more..

How did I come to know this?

At one point I discovered for myself for the first time an activity that I really liked. It was self-discovery in the form of Ironman training. I felt amazing and so incredibly open while working out. And it was liberating.

I saw and felt how I am suddenly a much better and more tolerant mother, who can handle so much more, be a better friend and, in my opinion, a better companion, even though you might think that training is tiring, right?! But no, it added so much to me instead! I also felt that I no longer had the anxiety inside me that I had all those years.

All of this made me wonder how this is possible. In my own opinion, I was so happy – previously only when I was working with my children (although deep inside for 10 years there was anxiety in my chest for some reason), but I didn’t understand what caused it at that moment. Only then did I realize it when I started working on myself, when I started feeling much lighter, happier, and I realized  – I was at peace..

It was a wonderful feeling… but at the same time scary and very confusing, because on the one hand I wondered if maybe I wasn’t being selfish to spend time on myself. It was so different compared to everything before. But since I never talked to anyone about it, I didn’t get any support either.

Now, however, we can give all mothers this opportunity – by educating society, as well as mothers themselves, about the possible dangers of burnout.


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